I honestly have no idea how to start this thing....this......blog?
What does that word really mean anyhow?
Either way, this is the first time I have ever "officially" blogged...and after being inspired by an article I read this morning, I think I might just start doing it more often. The article I read this morning was about "Weight Loss Bloggers" and the success they had in sharing their experience with the world. Within their blogs they shared all the nitty gritty details of their journey to weight loss. They recorded daily food intake, exercise chart - they listed the good, the bad, the mess ups and the TRIUMPHS! To me this sounded way to vulnerable, but the vulnerability is actually one of the freeing aspects of it... Facing the truth about your situation and being honest with yourself about it! HOW FREEING!! After I read this something in me sparked and I said to myself, "This is something I need!" Vulnerability and accountability in my life...even if nobody ever reads this...it feels good to get some things out.
So, I'm a virgin to blogging...it might take me a time or two to understand proper "blogger etiquette", if there is some...but over time I'm sure I'll get the hang of it.
So without further adieu...
My name is Stephanie and I'm hoping to start a GET MY LIFE BACK IN CONTROL blog. My life has been out of balance for a few years now and although I've been getting by, my life is slowly starting to show signs of wear and tear - like a wheel wobbling gently out of balance. I'm hoping that through blogging I can openly and honestly come to terms with the condition of my life, find the root of my problems, and over time get things back in order.
The first area I'm going to tackle is my weight and health. In fact, I could have started my blog about this topic alone, and will probably be on it for quite some time as well. To me this is the most obvious sign to me and many others that my life has been undisciplined and out of balance.
I'm 5'4", 30 years old, and I'm around right 145, maybe even 150...I'm not sure. I haven't wanted to get on the scale lately...(it's depresses me) but my "security blanket fat jeans" are starting to feel a little tighter which only indicates that I've probably gained some poundage...sigh.....
Things have got to change!
So I'm not really overweight for my height and age...but compared to the 5'4" 118 lbs I weighed about a 1 1/2 years ago...THERE IS DEFINITELY SOMETHING WRONG. I almost can't believe it myself when I read it! Almost 30 pounds in a little over a year?! Really?!?! Wow, talk about humiliating...I'm 30 years old and have never weighed more than 125 lbs in my life until now. It's embarrassing to face friends and loved ones, especially since I've been petite all my life. In fact, I almost didn't want to go home for Christmas to face the shame of seeing family I haven't seen in years...I had to build myself up just to make it home for the holidays.
And the weight gain isn't the only embarrassing part - it's HOW FAST I gained it. I can tell people who know me must sit around and scheme their own idea of what's wrong with me...
Is she sick?
Is she pregnant?
Depressed?
On drugs?
Or is she just SUPER LAZY and loves food?
Well...it's pretty obvious that to have that much weight gain in roughly 2 years there MUST be something wrong...and truthfully... anyone who changes something that drastically for the worse - IN ANY AREA of their life has SOMETHING WRONG. Some of things are obvious, others are still somewhat personal battles that I'm not quite prepared to share with the world, and other causes have probably yet to be revealed.....but I guess that's why I'm here...
To get to the bottom of it...and do something about it.
Well I guess that's all for now,
Steph!
